


Cry for Help

by InsaneAndHappyAboutIt



Series: Self-Destructive [5]
Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: Feels, M/M, Public Blow Jobs, Public Sex, Rough Sex, Smut and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 19:58:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13888074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneAndHappyAboutIt/pseuds/InsaneAndHappyAboutIt
Summary: Takes place during S7E3!!"Juice held the muzzle of the weapon and guided it to point right at his heart. He looked deep into Chibs’ eyes, silently begging him to pull the trigger. He wanted this."





	Cry for Help

**Author's Note:**

> This take place during the episode when Chibs went to the diner to meet with his PO and found Unser instead. Except in this version Unser is not around so it's just him and Juice. What could go wrong?...
> 
> Hope you enjoy the read!!

Chibs hung up on his PO and stirred the bike towards the agreed upon meeting place. A crowded diner wouldn’t have been his first choice but it wasn’t his meet to set. At least it was close by. The last time he had to deal with a purchase order he’d had to drive to the edge of Charming which was fucking ridiculous but he’d swallowed his indignation and done it anyway. Errand runs were a pain in the ass but they were necessary for the SAMCRO to function, especially now with their current rocky footing. Jax had his plate full and now that he no longer had Tara to take the edge off he was more unpredictable than ever. Chibs couldn’t deny he was scared for the boy and for the club. These were dangerous times.

As if sniffing a chink in his armour the many worries constantly snapping at the edges of his mind began mudding his thoughts. He worked overtime to keep the insidious hounds out but every now and then he threw them a bone. Now wasn’t the right time but once they were in, it was fucking impossible to drive them out. Chibs ground his teeth, pulling on the throttle and sending the machine into a speed which was way over the limit. He kind of hoped a pig would start chasing him because he felt like drawing some blood. Jax would have his hide but it wasn’t like the president could afford to lose any friends right now. He would get away with a slap on the wrists, assuming they didn’t stick him in jail…

After another minute of indulging this idiotic fantasy, Chibs slowed down. Him behind bars would help no one, least of all the club and he was shitting bricks at the idea of leaving an unstable Jax alone. Jax wasn’t the same after he got out of the clink. How could he be? He’d been the one to discover Tara murdered on their kitchen floor. They’d had their problems sure, but Chibs knew love when he saw it and Jax had loved Tara. Having the love of his life ripped away from him so violently and without any warning damaged him beyond repair. Chibs knew something about that sentiment… Though he was older and more experienced. He knew how to nurse a heartbreak without falling to pieces, on the outside.

Enough time passed since Juice left for Chibs to begin forgetting his love for the Puerto Rican, if it had even been that. At first he’d hoped the kid went missing, maybe kidnapped as leverage by one of their rival gangs or, worst case scenario, killed. Now he knew better. Now he knew Juice was nothing better than a filthy, back stabbing rat who abandoned his brothers. The hatred and rage he felt for the traitor rose like bile in his throat. He hadn’t even had the decency to come up front and face Chibs like a man. He recalled the last night they’d been together with painfully acute clarity. To think the son of a bitch had the stones to show up at his apartment, sleep with him and make some half-assed lie about loving the club more than anything else the very same night he ran like the cowered he clearly was.

Chibs was so enraged he nearly swerved into a tree, the edges of his vision turning red. He swore that if he ever found Juice he would kill him himself. The little shit owed him that much. He was too good to be killed by Jax. Chibs wasn’t a religious guy and he rarely prayed but he offered a silent thought to whatever deity chose to listen, if any, that he should be the first to find Juice. He wanted to look the rat in his dark eyes and see the truth. He wanted to know why someone who bled and killed for the patch would do what he did. The thought made him sick but he needed to understand for his own piece of mind or else some part of him would continue to whisper sentiments of sympathy. He stomped his boot on that voice now, banishing it to the darkest, furthest recesses of his mind. He would kill Juice Ortiz or see him dead if it was his last act on this Earth.

Chibs pulled his bike up in from of the diner, parking it near the curb in case he needed a quick getaway. He doubted the deal would go tits up, especially in a crowded place like this, but one could never be too careful. Before he walked towards the establishment he surreptitiously checked his gun, making sure it was loaded and good to go. A nearby kid caught sight of the weapon and looked at him with wide eyes. Hi mother was too engrossed in her phone conversation to notice. Chibs gave the kid a toothy smile and he immediately looked away as if caught doing something bad. Chibs chuckled at that, his mind free of the pesky hounds once more, and got ready to talk some business.

The table was chosen in advance so Chibs knew the man sitting in the sixth booth on the left, beside the window was his PO. He was wearing a black hoodie and a cap, drawn low over his eyes so Chibs couldn’t get a read on the man. He didn’t look like someone he’d had business with before which immediately had him on alert but he continued approaching, taking off his leather gloves as he did. The diner was busy but their booth was the furthest one back and both other booths were empty so they had sufficient privacy for their transaction. Chibs spotted a few cops in the place too. He really hoped this deal would go smoothly because there wasn’t dick he could do with the pigs standing five feet away. Not if he wanted to hold onto his freedom.

Chibs was standing beside the stranger when he froze, recognizing Juice. He was so taken aback by the unexpected sight he forgot all about his death wish or the gun waiting patiently at arm’s reach. Juice looked up at him, clearly unsurprised and Chibs realized he’d been set up. His instincts kicked in and his hand shot to his weapon but Juice shook his head before he could take it out. He was holding a gun of his own, barely visible under the table and Chibs pulled his hand back, hatred practically oozing out of his pores.

‘Sit down.’ Chibs would have rather jumped out the diner window than do what this traitor told him but one quick glance at the gun convinced him to play along for now. Maybe he would finally get some answers to his questions…

‘Jesus Christ. You dumb bastard.’ Chibs didn’t know if he should be impressed by Juice’s callousness or pissed off at the sight of him. In the end he settled on the latter.

‘I held your OP at gunpoint. It’s the only way I could get you to come alone. I needed to talk to you.’ Chibs balled his hands into fists to stop from reaching across the table and strangle the man.

‘We’re way past talking. You should have run when you had the chance.’ He was impressed with how level his voice sounded. He certainly didn’t feel levelled.

‘This is all I have.’ Juice unzipped his hoodie, showing his SAMCRO cut. Chibs noted his hand was off the gun. He could turn the table on him if he wanted to… ‘I got no place to run to!’ Juice looked at him with, and Chibs wouldn’t have believed this if it wasn’t happening right in front of him, hope in his eyes? What the fuck did the stupid rat think he could say in his defence? Chibs drew in a steading breath and looked away, more than a little exasperated. Maybe hearing Juice’s sorry confession wasn’t the right call after all. He should just shoot him now and take his chances with the feds afterwards. He thought it but he didn’t act on it. His gun remained out of sight.

‘What the hell do you want?’ The question was dragged out of him through clenched teeth. Whatever Juice asked for was moot. Chibs would only give him a bullet.

‘Did the club vote for Mayhem or is Jax doing this on his own?’ Chibs scoffed.

‘That’s none of your business.’ He couldn’t have been crueller if he’d slapped the kid. The message was clear and he could see Juice got it. He wasn’t privy to club matter anymore. He was estranged and him wearing the cut was an insult in of itself. Juice shook his head and tried again.

‘I need to know if there’s something I can do to earn my way back. I’ll do anything man. Please!’ Chibs didn’t know how much more of this shit he could take. Not only was Juice’s groundless hope grinding but he could hear the sincerity in the other biker’s voice. He honest to God believed there was something he could do to earn his way back. What a fucking joke!

‘If I were you…’ Juice leaned in, eager to hear what Chibs had to say. ‘…I’d get that gun…’ A hasty nod. ‘…put it in my mouth and pull the trigger.’ Chibs watched with sadistic satisfaction as the hopeful light in Juice’s eyes flickered out of existence. The gleam in the dark depths pulled at something near his heart but Chibs hardened himself to the feeling. He would not feel sorry for Juice. He would not!

A heavy silence fell over them like the curtain at the end of a show. There was nothing left to say on the matter but Juice kept looking at him, waiting for something even as Chibs witnessed a dead calm settle in. He imagined in some misguided attempt Juice reached out to him in a last shot at hope and now he’d cruelly yanked that last lifeline away. He could practically see the rat drown. Finally, with a small nod Juice got to his feet. Chibs watched him, waiting for the moment when he could strike. He planned to follow the Puerto Rican, maybe catch up to him in a more secluded place and send him to Mister Mayhem all wrapped up with bloody ribbons.

But Juice didn’t head for the exit. He went to the back of the diner and one look told Chibs he was in the restroom. He couldn’t fucking believe it. Was the crazy bastard really doing what he thought he was doing? Had the imbecile lost his last grasp on sanity while on the lam? Chibs shook his head in wonderment, scoffing at the preposterous invitation, determined to wait it out. Maybe he was the crazy one, reading into hints that weren’t there. Maybe Juice wanted to piss one last time before dealing with Chibs. Fifteen minutes later the Scotsman knew that wasn’t the case and he left the booth. He didn’t head for the exit.  

There was a man washing his hands and Chibs barked at him to get out. He began voicing some pathetic complaint before he looked at Chibs properly and saw the reaper logo. That shut him up quick enough and he ran out faster than the cartoon mouse, Speedy Gomez or something. Chibs checked the stalls, all empty except one and it wasn’t locked. He still had enough time to put an end to this foolishness but instead of doing the smart thing he let himself into the small cubicle, locking the door behind him.

Juice glanced up at him before he dropped to his knees and worked his cock free of his jeans. His cap was off and Chibs got a look at the growth of hair running along Juice’s scalp, hiding the tribal tattoos he’d been used to seeing from his vantage point. He was inclined to run his fingertips against the pitch black blades but he refused to give Juice any ideas that he still felt anything other than hatred for him. He would fuck the man but there would be no love in it. He was just another hole to bury his wet dick in. Whatever tender moments they might have shared in the past were mistakes he would soon forget completely.

He grabbed the back of Juice’s head and pushed him down, forcing him to take the full length of his throbbing cock into his mouth. Juice groaned, making a strangled choking sound but didn’t struggle. Chibs knew he could take it and sure enough, after a few deep thrusts, Juice found his bearing. He drew in breath through his nose and let Chibs move his head to the pace he wanted. There was nothing forgiving about Chibs’ treatment. Juice’s jaw was beginning to hurt and his eyes were stinging but he could tell Chibs was on the verge of coming. He could taste the salty precum on his tongue and a moment later his mouth was flooded with the hot spurts.

Chibs’ cock left his mouth with a wet, filthy sound and Juice coughed a handful of times before licked his lips, tasting the last of the white spunk. Chibs grabbed him by the arm and hoisted him to his feet, shoving him harshly against the wall of the stall. All the air whooshed out of Juice as his hands rose automatically to break the impact. The noise probably attracted some attention but Chibs had made sure the employees saw him go into the bathroom. They knew what his affiliation was and if they had half a brain between them then they knew not to barge in. Chibs pulled Juice’s hoodie off and his cut. He wasn’t going to fuck a brother, not like this. Juice wearing the symbol of their fraternity was a deal breaker.

Juice felt his pants being pushed down his knees and he got ready for what came next. He doubted Chibs would take the time to stretch him. Fortunately he’d taken care of some preliminary preparation himself while he waited for Chibs to make up his mind and follow him to the bathroom. He’d hoped Chibs would follow him. He’d hoped there was still something left between them and when he saw the man enter the stall he knew that Chibs hadn’t completely given up on him. Juice knew better than to beg for anything more but having him pressed against him gave him just enough hope to keep him going. That’s how desperate he was for even the smallest crumb of forgiveness.

The pressure of Chibs’ forearm against the back of his neck held Juice pinned to the wall before a jolt of pain shot up his spine. He groaned when Chibs shoved his rock hard member inside his tight hole. Spots danced across the back of his eyelids as he tried to breathe through the sudden jolt, his body struggling to accommodate. Chibs began moving, the hand on Juice’s hip holding the flesh with bruising force. Juice had to push back just to stop his body from being banged painfully against the wall. Was it fucked up that he was getting hard? It wasn’t like Juice had a fetish about being raped but he definitely had a dominance kink. He’d found that out the hard way with Jax… Being dominated by Chibs, a man he really wanted to spread his legs for, did wonders for his stiffy and before long his groans became a hell of a lot closer to moans.

‘Chibs-…’ A hand clamped across his mouth and Juice understood. Calling names out was against the rules. The hand stayed pressed against his lips and two fingers reached inside to run along his tongue. Juice sucked them in with gusto, twisting his verbal muscles around the digits like he’d done when he had a cock pushing against the back of his throat.

Chibs growled, his breath hot against the nape of Juice’s neck as he snapped his hips forwards, ramming with unforgiving force against the sensitive bundle of nerves. If it wasn’t for the fingers gagging him, Juice would have made enough noise to bring the whole block rushing in. Teeth grazed against his skin but didn’t bite. Chibs didn’t want to mark him. There would be no physical memory of this slip up. Juice felt his balls tighten and he brought a hand to his needy erection. Chibs wouldn’t work him so he had to if he wanted to come. He set up a pace fast and sloppy enough to match Chibs’ thrusts, knowing the other biker was also dancing on the cliff’s edge.

Juice swallowed against the fingers pinching his tongue, his eyes shutting as the wave built. He wanted Chibs to call his name in that possessive, hungry voice which was drenched in sex but he was shit out of luck. The fingers silencing any coherent words made it clear the no name rule was still in play. A wild shiver rippled along him and he tried giving a warning but it came out as more senseless noise. Cum shot into his hand, staining his white t-shirt too and his muscles spasmed and clenched around Chibs’ cock. It was the final push for the other man too and Juice gasped for breath at the sensation of being filled. They stayed like that a while, harsh breaths raking through both their overworked bodies, before Chibs stepped back.

Juice chanced a glance over his shoulder, hoping to see a little tenderness but Chibs still had that same unforgiving, disappointed look in his eyes. He got dressed quickly and Juice did the same, neither speaking a word. He realized that for Chibs this fuck had been as emotionless as his time with a paid whore. Juice was beginning to see how stupid it was to hold on to hope. Chibs took him up on his invitation because he wanted a quick screw, not because he still had some lingering sentiment of love for him. The thought cut like a knife and Juice was running out of ways to patch the wound up.

Juice found his cap and put it back on. When he focused back on Chibs he stood paralysed, staring into the barrel of his gun. He glanced from the weapon to the man and from the man to the weapon, surprised at how okay he was with this. Well if that wasn’t fucked up… Juice realized that if he had to be shot he’d rather be done in by Chibs. It was the best outcome he had any right to hope for this late in the game. He reached for the gun, carefully, ready to lower his hand if Chibs told him to. He didn’t so Juice held the muzzle of the weapon and guided it to point right at his heart. He looked deep into Chibs’ eyes, silently begging him to pull the trigger. He wanted this. It would make everything so much easier and he knew Mister Mayhem would welcome a coward like him with open arms.  

‘What are you doing laddie?’ Chibs narrowed his eyes, for the first time in more than half his life, understanding how easy killing was. All it took was an impulse and a finger pressing a trigger. He hadn’t spared a thought on the frailty of human life since his first kill, yet that impulse which usually came with ease was nowhere to be found now.

‘Do it. We both know this is how it’ll end anyway. Either you kill me now or I keep running until Jax or someone else catches up and kills me then. You said it yourself. I should just cut my losses and fucking end it, right?’ Chibs ground his teeth because everything Juice said was true.

‘If you want to end it then do it yourself like the coward you are. I’m not doing your dirty work for you.’ Chibs lowered his gun, hating himself for it. The truth was, he couldn’t fucking pull the trigger but that was a truth he would take to his grave.

‘I’m sorry brother. I never meant to hurt the club. It’s the only family I have.’ Chibs rolled his eyes, rethinking his decision not to shoot.

‘Leave before I change my mind rat. Call me again and I promise you, I’ll kill you myself.’Chibs fixed him with a steely glare and after a moment Juice nodded. He moved past Chibs but just before he unlocked the door he caught Chibs’ eyes one more time. They were close enough for him to smell Chibs’ cologne.

‘I love you brother.’ Chibs didn’t look at him and Juice didn’t wait for a reply. He knew Chibs still cared for him, enough to let him get away, and that made this whole trip worth the risk. Gemma would kick his ass once she got wind of it though… ‘If you follow me, I’ll open a round in your tires.’ With that he was gone and Chibs still didn’t have the answers he was looking for. He had nobody to blame though. He never asked the questions…

**Author's Note:**

> Oh Chibs you big softy! You know you still love him so quit lying to yourself you old dog!! XD I hope it was a fun read and please let me know what you thought in the comments section below!! 
> 
> Have a brilliant day!! XD


End file.
